Friday 4 July 2014

What do we want from our children?



The school year has just ended and I must admit that aside from the relief of reaching the end of term, there is a small degree of sadistic satisfaction in knowing that for the next two months the parents of my class will be under pressure to keep their children occupied and content. Of course the tables are turned again when school resumes anew in September. Most parents are suspiciously pleased to see me again and mutter that the school holidays are really a bit generous in length and it is high time for little Johnny to get on with his learning again. 


The end of the year is bitter sweet for both teachers and children. There is a close constant relationship that has grown over the year that ends abruptly with the last school bell of the year. It is a time for a breather too but most importantly it is time to reflect on the year that has just passed. Teaching throughout the year is filled with not only delivering a curriculum, extension and support, continual assessment of progress and of equal importance too is the pastoral and emotional support. Yet, the  end of the year is terminal and puts your efforts in a stark light. For a year, they have been yours to teach, guide and nurture and now their care under your charge is up. Which children did you feel you really helped? Who did you not quite reach? 


Teaching provides an unintentional insight into parenting and children once you have their trust openly let you in. You become a family member of sorts and in some cases spend more time with the children over the year than their parents might if they have demanding work schedules. Teaching is by far the most rewarding work I have ever done and one of the more difficult components of the job are the parents. All parents want the best for their children and the most challenging aspect can be separating the development of the child from the ambitions of the parent. I know a child who at the age of seven would explain exactly which univiersities he would study at (Oxford and M.I.T in that order) and what field he would specialise in. I am all for setting goals, and it is a big focus in my classroom, but these goals are completely disconnected from any imput from the child. I sincerely hope he does attend these universities - if they are really what he wants from life. But at the moment that decision has not been his to make. It is the parent that seeking validation through the success of their children. It is a heavy burden for them to carry, because at some stage there will be disappointment along the way. 


A happy child. Again something all teachers and parents try to achieve. It sounds such a nonsensical thing to say but sometimes it is harder to achieve that you would think. Children need all the things they have always needed, safety, time to play, support and boundaries but it is harder than ever to provide these things for our children. What parents and children often do for leisure is to go shopping together. It is a strange cycle of a temporary reward equalling happiness. It is fleeting. Brand awareness amongst children is bordering on disturbing. One child I taught was looking forward to a parent returning from a business trip. I asked how long the parent had been away for and was told without scruple that the reason was that the parent had been working in the U.S and always brought back better presents that when they went to other destinations. Dr Tessa Livingstone, an expert in child psychology, and author of ‘Child of Our Time: Early Learning is of the view that our society has equated happiness with success and all the trappings of consumerism that go with it. Even today, the things children love the most are free. It feels to me that it is a battle that we are losing though and too many parents are too afraid to say no. 


In the words of Zoolander, kids need to read good. And be able to do maths good too. But they are not the overriding indicators of success and development. Schools go to great lengths to track pupil progress and often academics are the main focus because they are easy to assess. What should go hand-in-hand with the academic side are the values and qualities we want our children to develop, but they cannot be quantified in SATs or levelled against a national average. 


Children need to learn things; facts, skills and values. Education has to incorporate values because it is through values that goals are formed and acted on. Several classes and their attendant parents have passed through my doors, and in keeping with the theme of reflection, these are values and qualities that I try to instill in my class - and will at a later stage to my own children. 

Politeness: it might seem a little old fashioned but simply it is just the right way to interact with others. 

Passion: not only finding out what you love, but also becomming interested in what you are doing. I see it all the time, you can motivate children to become passionate about what they are learning quite easily. The key is - you have to be passionate about it!

Curiosity: becomming interested in something means you will question and seek to learn more. This sense of enquiry is critical. You can learn most things, but curiosity as a skill or quality is truly transferable. 

Resilience: not everything works out the way you want. Being able to pick yourself up and carry on is incredibly important. 


Steven Levitt, author of Freakonomics and professor of economics at the Universty of Chicago says that when he looks at his students, the truly exceptional ones combine a creativity and excitement for life. If we are not sending our kids to school for these reasons then I am not sure why we are sending them at all. 

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